Exploring Roles in the Local Early Childhood Community

      In our careers and education, the image of an Early Childhood Professional seems to jump to preschool education or child care. There is so much more that must occur in the lives of children long before learning to read and count.  The quality of family life is at the very heart of early childhood. Support for the family is a community’s first mission: If life is good for families, it is good for everyone. In my local area in Cleveland Ohio, I am drawn to a few organizations that are committed to the well-being of families.  There are two models for local Family Rooms that invite families of very young children to socialize, learn parenting skills and discuss child-related issues, serve as a resource for basic and personal needs, and generally validate Bronfenbrenner’s Ecological Theory by building a strong and positive influential microsystem.  The Lakewood Family Room is an extension of the city’s Department of Health and Human Services. The Shaker Family Room provides the same early childhood and family support, but collaborates more with school officials in an effort to prepare families for school, and the school for local families. Both are smart moves to build strong families in thriving communities. The Ohio Department of Education also assists communities in building Early Childhood PTA programs.  The Cuyahoga County Family Justice Center is a now-forming family service program, intending to pull together under one roof all needed services for families who have experienced domestic violence. The site below shows some shocking photos of moms in trouble. So many little children have witnessed or experienced such abuse, and are forever changed by it. Strong early childhood programs can work to create places free from fear so that children can grow and learn with fewer developmental obstacles.

      The employment opportunities in the family room examples are few, as mid to small-sized cities seldom include Health and Human Services with a focus on Early Childhood in their city budgets.  In the case of Lakewood Family Room, there is one such job available, and it has been filled, with a long wait list.  The Shaker Family Room pays a stipend to its Director from a private grant foundation.  I believe there is potential future employment opportunity for the Family Justice Center when implementation is near, though it is likely that most services will be provided by existing agencies, making the employment opportunity for this agency likely to come from the County Department of Children and Family Services. Early Childhood experience and education, especially in mental health, seems to be what is needed, as well as a frugal lifestyle. When working with the Family Justice Center, it will also be necessary for staff to have access to and a plan for managing personal mental health.

Ohio Department of Education

http://education.ohio.gov/GD/Templates/Pages/ODE/ODEDetail.aspx?Page=3&TopicRelationID=1793&Content=117943

Lakewood Family Room

http://www.onelakewood.com/HumanServices/EarlyChildhood/FamilyRoom.aspx

Shaker Heights Family Room

http://www.familyconnections1.org/facilities/shakerplayroom.php

Family Justice Center

http://ja.cuyahogacounty.us/en-US/family-justice-center-new.aspx

Communicating Ahead

Thanks to my course colleagues who had to be trusting enough in this class and in past courses to divulge failures in personal and professional communications along with what worked. It is because we have been supportive of each other that we have been able to speak frankly about our experiences, beliefs, successes, and failures. Such support has been encouraged and nurtured by Dr. Myers. May we continue to be as supportive of friends, family, and colleagues as we continue our careers in the Early Childhood Field.

Team Building and Collaboration- Adjourning

     As I have considered the groups in which I have been involved, I recognize that whether formal or informal, we have had some sort of closing ritual. The Recognition Committee which I recalled for its lack of clear vision did indeed have a most effective closure. The committee met twice more after the training institute to review the session evaluations, and then to make notes for the following year's committee. A less formal family planning committee for my parents' 50th wedding anniversary conducted meetings before the event, but really had no formal adjournment, though the clean up after the guests left was a time of discussion and planning for the future. The event is recounted frequently at family functions.( It was a smashing success, a highlight in our family history.) In both experiences, there certainly was no sadness at separating from the group or meetings. The goals were very clearly reached, successfully, and there was no need to feel anything but positive about moving on to the next adventure. Both our text (O'Hair & Wiemann, 2009) and The Five Stages of Team Development: A Case Study (Abudi, 2010) indicate that the stage of adjournment brings sadness at separation. I disagree. If the outcome was successful, and if relationships are strengthened, why wouldn't separation from the project be a natural transition to the next activity? I find that at the end of such a group effort, there is plenty of work and play waiting for me, and I am not sad to move on. I will not be sad to have successfully completed my studies at Walden, and if I continue to build relationships that have begun here, all the better. Mission accomplished.

References:

Abudi, G. (2010). The five stages of team development: A case study. Retrieved from http://www.projectsmart.co.uk/the-five-stages-of-team-development-a-case-study.html



O’Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. (2009). Real communication. New York: Bedford/St. Martin’s.

Non-Violent Communication and Conflict Management

I have recently experienced yet another communication conflict with a sibling, the same sibling. Her initial attack was not focused at me, but towards a brother in the audience of the rest of us, via e-mail, the great impersonal channel. The root of the conflict was money. Surprised? The conflict between us was triggered by a combination of unbalanced costs and rewards and incompatible life goals in that money is not as important as strong and loyal sibling relationships. Through brief e-mails, we tried to discuss options and alternatives and also to debate and argue the merits of both sides of the disagreement. A plea for her to consider the outcomes of her actions and communications affecting her and the others was met with verbal combativeness. I, and I believe the other four siblings, have resorted to separation from her until such time as she can become more other-minded in her behavior and communications. I have evaluated this outcome to be lose-lose. No one wins from family estrangement. Perhaps the time of separation will allow healing enough to repair the family relationships. This is the most appealing non-violent strategy that I have been able to comfortably use in such an emotion-filled conflict.

Who Am I as a Communicator?

        The first most surprising result of the communication evaluations that I took and compared with others' assessments of me came from my brother's evaluation of my level of verbal aggression, "Significant", far above scores from two other evaluators. When he saw the description of the score he earned for me, he became concerned that the assessment was too harsh. Together we reconstructed the test and answers, and he explained his reason for each one, still scoring in the "Significant" range. He then took the test to evaluate his own verbal aggression level, and scored also in the "Significant" range. He believed that the answers he gave did not add up to the description of a significantly aggressive verbal communication style. That his was the only score difference among the evaluators was the first part of the surprise, but that he evaluated himself in the same range as how he evaluated me also caused me to take a closer look at why such a disparity had occurred. I project that the difference in score came from two schemas that were not possessed by the other evaluators; He is a male, and he is a self-employed businessman. I had considered that perhaps I change my communication style to match his when we converse or debate issues, but I believe that the results came from his perception of my verbal style based on his experiences with me as a colleague in business, his business partner schema. The other participants were younger females in non-business roles, and evaluated me almost exactly the same as my personal assessment. Because my current colleagues are mostly younger females in non-business roles, I am unconcerned with being perceived as verbally aggressive. If I return to a business career, or if I have the opportunity to communicate with early childhood education funders who are business people, I may possess an adequately aggressive style to be noticed and heard by men who may perceive aggression in communication with a different schematic lens.

Communicating and Collaborating

Just as a skilled child care provider will change body position to meet the eye level of a child, and adjusts tone of voice and vocabulary to match what the child understands, so do I adjust my communications with different individuals or groups. This is what other-mindedness is all about, learning what the communication needs of the other person are, and meeting them to better understand and to be better understood. And because all individuals have their own cultural identities, I believe that the most important and the most challenging communication strategy for me to use is to be non-judgemental. Asking questions to clarify my communication partners' intentions will help me to better understand their ideas, and remaining neutral, or non-judgemental, will help me to stay in the conversation without getting lost in my own emotions that could become stirred by what I have heard. I believe that most are skilled at talking about themselves. When I can give another person the opportunity to talk about one's self, I am building a relationship of trust, and the other person reveals more as the communication continues. This is so easily observed with young children. Sit at the lunch table with four year olds and ask them about their lunch or their favorite foods. Soon they will be telling you everything. The topic that people know the most about is themselves, and children will talk about what they know best. After talking and listening during lunch to a child with challenging behavior, I have learned that the child's father has been released from jail and is back at home. Now my communication with this child's parents is not so much about changing the child, but about support for some stressful conditions at home. To communicate more effectively with each culturally different person I encounter, I would like to

• remain non-judgemental
• ask questions to clarify the person's viewpoints, and
• encourage the other person to talk about his or her ideas and experiences, and talk less about my own.

Communiction on TV

Observing the Nickelodeon television show, Digrassi, without sound, non-verbal behavior seemed mostly easy to read. There are several sub-plots on this show about social problems that high school teens encounter and how they solve them. In this episode, a boy was shrink-wrapped, presumably naked, to the school flagpole. As a group of boys were addressed individually by adults in the gym, the perpetrator looked guilty with his face looking to the floor, and speaking to the adults with his head in a low position.  The two male adults seemed bothered by the woman adult who questioned the guilty boy close to him. She smiled as she spoke, but the other adults had perplexed looks on their faces.She left the gym quickly.Without words, she may have been the principal making threats. The spoken lines revealed that she was the bullied child's mother making threats to find out who had hazed her son. Later, when the two boys spoke in the hall, they were physically close, face to face, with serious expressions.The hazed boy put his finger on the chest of the aggressor. They looked directly at each other. The spoken lines revealed a plan for revenge by the hazing victim. In another social dilemma between two girls, the leader of a dance group was challenged by a girl set on showing her up. Both of these girls smiled at each other while speaking. Without sound, they might have been friends in disagreement. The challenger used rapidly changing facial expressions, from smiling to haughty. Both girls communicated at a physical distance. With sound, one girl smiled as she spoke in a conciliatory manner, The challenger spoke insults through her smile.
It was easy to identify the roles of the boys and men during the soundless viewing. The close physical proximity to each other and facial expressions were clear indicators of what they communicated to each other. The girls and women, however, were not so easily read. Smiling is usually an indicator of positive feeling and intentions, yet in the spoken viewing, challenges and insults were communicated through smiles. In contrast to the boys in conflict, the girls were physically positioned as if they stood on either side of an invisible line.
Perhaps these television programs are reinforcing the widely accepted belief that female communication is complicated and is not always as it seems. In addition, they provide a model for young girls, soon to enter adulthood, for communication that is deceitful, as these girls smiled though they were angry and competitive. This viewing affirms my disdain for television, and supports my parenting restrictions on television viewing for my children and grandchildren over the past 25 years.